In my life and work, I always fought to be a winner. I had an irresistible "get it done" attitude. I always wanted to appear strong,wise,courageous and decisive. My ego would be deeply hurt if I was not the one who provides the solution to a problem bought up in a team meeting at work. Being number 2 was something I always wanted to avoid at the cost of immense hard work. I felt deeply down whenever I was put in a situation in which I am perceived incompetent compared to others (example : a meeting on a topic about which I have no idea). I would always try my best to avoid appearing vulnerable to others. I always wanted to appear self sufficient and self dependent.
Thus, I suppressed my soft emotions. And I fell for the stereotypical notion that certain things are "girly" or "sissy" and not suitable for a man. The more I suppressed, my cross dreaming strengthened. I have an instinctive guess that it is this suppressed softer side of me is what is showing up as my inner woman. I needed to accept that a softer, tender (and feminine) side exists within me.
I came to the inevitable realization that I can no more deny the presence of my inner woman. I need to soften up, and bring her softness into my life as a man. And I needed a plan for that. I will cover that in the next article.
Thus, I suppressed my soft emotions. And I fell for the stereotypical notion that certain things are "girly" or "sissy" and not suitable for a man. The more I suppressed, my cross dreaming strengthened. I have an instinctive guess that it is this suppressed softer side of me is what is showing up as my inner woman. I needed to accept that a softer, tender (and feminine) side exists within me.
I came to the inevitable realization that I can no more deny the presence of my inner woman. I need to soften up, and bring her softness into my life as a man. And I needed a plan for that. I will cover that in the next article.
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